Monday, February 26, 2007
- 3:49 AM
so i was right. i wasnt put in the team because basically, i suck. as i thought. i had hoped slightly that it wasnt true. but now, my worse fears are just confirmed. to hear it. it's painful. its beyond my imagination. i didnt expect it to hurt so much but yeah it did. and i tell you, it's the only thing on this whole universe, other than you. that can make me break down instantly. i swear. sigh but it's over. and what she said to me is true. i am the only sec4 player who doesnt have a medal.. i have achieved NOTHING in my whole 4 yrs in new town.. wasted. tsk tsk. sad isnt it? oh well. nvm. it's just 4th. not like it was 1st or anything. but still! ahhhhh. sad. but i blame nobody but myself for it. cause it is afterall, ALL MY FAULT. sigh. oh well. nth i can do about it. i guess it's better to move on and hope for better things in my life than dwell on these stupid things. that i noe will come to no use to me. and coach says my attitude sucks. GREAT. hell. i dont know what he means by that. but yeah. to him i guess it stinks. and i cant change his mind. he only likes her attitude yea? wad can i do. oh well. and she says that she is not sure if she wants to be as close as before.. NOT SURE. means she's having doubts. sigh. i feel so wasted. like i was worth NTH to her all these years.. ): ps. i have nv bitched about you on my blog alright. i'm entitled to my own feelings!
