Wednesday, January 17, 2007
- 5:35 PM
i hate myself. ): i'm sucha loser. i didnt make it into the 18 for south zone. cos i'm just not good enough. i think. well yeah. i'm not. i suck now. have u seen me play. omg. it's worse than ever. sigh. and i was cap. but looks like no longer. cos now its yijun. go jun!! ((: do what i could never do. anyways. im a screw up really. im a hopeless case.. i cant do anything right. seeing counsellor, doctor and blah blah. cmon. which 16 yr old to be sees so many ppl??? argh. that's me for you. a simple down to earth loser. unable to be who i was made to be. floating arnd. unwillingly carrying on with life. for the sake of all my frens and family. thanks guys. xp. but selfish ol me keeps putting everyone thru hell. if i wanna go thru hell. let me! but why come along with me??? that's defying the purpose! isn it? and now everyone's following me arnd like im some stupid suicidal freak. ok. maybe i am. but i hate being followed everywhere. i know they care. but.. sigh. i dont know. im being protected. honoured. (:
anyways. great. just had my feelings of feelin left out reaffirmed. all i wanted to do was play softball. for my last yr. now that's gone too. my o's are also gonna die. wad's next?? who knew u could change so much in one yr? *quoted frm ms tan. well, the vidya we all knew is dead. im sorry i dont think i can bring her back. she's gone too far. -lost- for good.
